Role models teach us about ourselves. For children in particular, they help to define what they feel is important and valuable. Children often use them as models of comparison with themselves, and when they believe that they share characteristics, it helps them to believe in themselves. If they find that they are like the person they admire—in some way—it is easier to believe that they are OK themselves. Sharing characteristics provides an important kinship.

Role models are teachers of:

• Character, helping to define what we value and admire, and perhaps over time, what we feel is less important;
• Possibilities, that we may not have thought obtainable and which inspire us to try harder and keep hoping;
• Strategies, for handling life’s challenges which help to make us think we, too, can overcome barriers;
• Goals, that we may not have set for ourselves if we did not have a role model to lead us.

Role models who also happen to be adoptees are particularly important for our children because adoption is a difference that is not shared with many others. It is a difference that can affect children’s self-esteem; we know that at certain times of their lives, children may feel that adoption somehow makes them less capable or valuable. Role models can help them to realize that there are millions of adoptees and the great majority grow up to be successful and happy. In some cases, adoption provides opportunities to make children more resilient, or to develop skills or interests they might not have otherwise.

To help our children find these role models, it is helpful for them to have the opportunities to interact with children from a wide variety of adoption experiences. It is important to provide them with opportunities to make connections to ALL adoptees, regardless of whether their adoption stories are similar or not. For example, Washington D.C. Mayor Anthony Williams can inspire all of our children, although few will share commonalties with his adoption story. They can be empowered by learning how he incorporated his identity as an adoptee with the very successful person he is today.

Do you know any of these successful adoptees?

• Sarah McLachlan - a musician, songwriter, performer and winner of two Grammy Awards; she and her two older brothers were adopted.
• Edward Albee -Playwright
• John J. Audubon – Naturalist
• Surya Bonaly – Olympic Figure Skater
• Les Brown - Motivational Speaker
• Peter and Kitty Carruthers – Olympic Skaters
• Christina Crawford – Author
• Daunte Culpepper – football players, Minnesota Vikings
• Faith Daniels - TV News Personality
• Eric Dickerson - Pro Football Player
• Melissa Gilbert - Actor
• Scott Hamilton – Olympic Skater
• Faith Hill - Singer
• Brent Jasmer - Actor
• Steve Jobs - Founder, Apple Computer
• Art Linkletter - TV Personality
• Charlotte Anne Lopez - Miss Teen USA
• Greg Louganis - Olympic Diver
• James Michener - Author
• Tom Monaghan - Founder, Domino’S Pizza
• Dan O’Brien - Olympic Gold Medalist
• Jim Palmer - Pro Baseball Player
• Wilson Riles - Educator
• Dave Thomas - Founder, Wendy’s

Because of the way adoption is portrayed in literature, the media, and Hollywood; children are likely to be unaware of how common it is for adoptees to grow up as successful, “normal” adults. Strive to surround them with that message! We can educate the world about the overwhelming success of adoptees. We can let EVERYONE know that there are many adoptees—some famous, others who are not—who can be role models for others!

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