Addressing the Needs of Adopted Teens

Most parents agree the adolescent and teen years are without question the most challenging for their children and for the family as a whole. This can be especially true in the case of adopted children who, like all teens, struggle with issues related to who they are and who they want to be. Imagine the added confusion during this crucial developmental stage, when teens reflect on their unique situation as an adopted child.

Questions that may not have bothered adoptive children in the past, take on new meaning in the teen years when they are actively working to define themselves and differentiate themselves from their parents. "Why do you look different from your mom and dad?" "What happened to your birth parents?" These and other questions resurface in the mind of the adoptive child and, when not addressed, become a source of frustration and confusion that can lead to low self-esteem, anxiety, depression and related problems.

Debbie Riley and Dr. John Meeks reveal in their book, Beneath the Mask: Understanding Adopted Teens, that though only 2% of American children are adopted, they make up one-third of the teens in therapy. The statistics support their thesis: adopted children endure a special set of emotional issues that reemerge during adolescence. Unless therapists and parents understand and deal with the wounds of adoption, teens cannot heal and become healthy adults.

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