Resources for Families with Adopted Children
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West Virginia Foster Parents Forming Statewide Support Group

An effort is underway in West Virginia to form a statewide support and advocacy group for foster parents. Charleston Gazette staff writer Susan Williams described the effort in a Dec. 4 article:
Rachel Probst, support specialist for Mission West Virginia, said West Virginia has no active group that encompasses the entire state. & "First of all, we want to improve the quality of life for children in foster care. But foster parents and adoptive parents also need a collective voice." &

Although Probst works for Mission West Virginia, she said the new foster parent group will be independent of her organization.

"We want to be a central resource for parents," Probst said. "We want to educate people about the role of foster parents, and we want to be a support group for them and for adoptive parents.
For more information about the new group call 866-225-5698.

Labels: foster care, foster parents, awareness, support, west virginia

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Adoption Support Group Meeting in Iowa Thursday (Nov. 19)

On Thursday, November 19th, adoptive families are invited to attend a support group at Our Savior Lutheran Church in Newton, Iowa.
The support group meeting will be led by Iowa KidsNets Ames Area Adoption Network. KidsNet is the statewide collaboration of agencies that recruits, trains, licenses and provides support for Iowas foster and adoptive families. (Source: Newton Daily News)
The meeting will begin at 6:30 p.m. Childcare and snacks will be provided. For more information visit the KidsNet website at www.iowakidsnet.com.

Labels: adoptive parents, support, iowa

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Rochester Group Helps Support Parents During International Adoption Process

Adopting a child can be a decidedly circuitous process -- an experience that can be much more confusing (and frustrating) for parents who are attempting to adopt a child from a foreign country.

To help clarify the process -- and to provide a source of comfort for those who are trying to adopt internationally -- a group of women in Rochester, N.Y. have formed an international adoption support group.
A group of Rochester women began gathering once a month more than a year ago to talk about their experiences and offer emotional support to one another.

Who else, after all, would understand a process in which certified documents and dossiers can be so critical in adopting a foreign-born child? Or how a missed signature can suddenly throw the process out of whack for weeks, if not months? How those months and even years add up to an emotional rollercoaster ride few would understand except those who have been through it.

"It's just nice to have somebody else that understands the process, that you're not constantly explaining something to people. You just talk about your feelings without giving some type of explanation," said Elyse Mitchell, who, along with her husband, adopted a girl from Korea last summer.
(Source: WCCO Rochester, June 27)
According to the WCCO article, the U.S. State Department estimates that more than 17,000 foreign children were adopted by U.S. parents in 2008, a reduction from more than 22,000 in 2004.

Labels: international, support

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South Dakota Church Honored for Adoptions

Adoption is a life-changing decision for both parent and child. It's also an expensive decision, the costs of which can prevent some would-be adoptive parents from even beginning the process. The people at Hillcrest Baptist Church in Sioux Falls, S.D., know this - and they also know they can turn to their church for help with adoption costs.
"Saturday, Sen. Tim Johnson recognized the church as honorees of the 2008 Angels in Adoption award. He heard from families facing their own challenges of adoption. They told him without the help of their church it wouldn't be possible."
The money in the church's adoption fund was originally earmarked for a new facility, but with adoption costs rising, church leaders felt the money would be better invested in new families instead of a new building. Source: KSFY News (SD)

Labels: awards, support, expenses

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Families Walk to Help Kids Find New Homes

On June 28, nearly 130 families from California's Santa Clarita Valley participated in "Walk Your Talk" charity walk and family festival. The annual event raises awareness and support for Child SHARE, a faith-based organization that helps families provide permanent homes for foster and adoptive children.
"The goal of the event was to raise awareness about the need for adoptive families, while giving thanks to the families of the Santa Clarita Valley who have brought foster children into their lives."
The mile-long walk took participants from the Canyon Country church to the intersection of Sierra Highway and Soledad Canyon Road. Among the participants were Jim and Michelle Riley, a couple whose recent adoption was prompted by a billboard advertisement they'd seen for Child SHARE. Source: The Signal

Labels: awareness, support, charity

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Carnival-type Celebration Designed to Encourage Adoption

On a Saturday in June, the parking lot of Immanuel Baptist Church in Little Rock, Arkansas, was filled with Disney-themed rides and games. Celebrations like this are far from rare, but this event was unique in one special way: Most of the children who were enjoying the rides were available for adoption.
"In between rigging a game so that every participant could win, Pat Page, director of the Children and Family Services Division .... said the picnic is a way for the children to meet people interested in adoption in an informal setting."
A similar event in 2007 resulted in three or four adoptions, and organizers said they were hoping for more this year. In addition to encourage actual adoption, the event serves to raise awareness about the need for adoptive parents in Arkansas. Source: NWA News

Labels: awareness, encouragement, support

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Moms Honored at Special Luncheon

This coming Sunday, May 11, the Renaissance Austin Hotel is hosting and funding a special "Salute to Foster/Adoptive Moms." The event will include brunch and a special program that honors moms who make unique contributions through adoptive and foster parenthood.
"This year's event brings a new perspective with a focus on the mother's personal needs for self rejuvenation and relaxation. The 12 moms who have been invited with their families will receive a gift bag of cosmetics, donated by Saks Fifth Avenue."
The hotel is also providing a masseuse for neck and shoulder massages, and a photographer to take family portraits. Source: PR Web

Labels: support, mothers, holidays

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Author Shares Adoption Stories

Her name - Elle Conner - isn't real, but her story is, and she tells it beautifully in "Miracle in the City of Angels: An International Adoption Story."
"As a mother who has experienced raising biological children and an adoptive child, Conner communicates the emotions and events of adoption in a language everyone can relate to, as when she describes the moment the family receives 'The Call.'"
"The Call," of course, is what all adoptive parents wait for: the moment when someone on the other end of a telephone tells them they can come and get their child. Connor and co-author Erin Brown Conroy are already making plans for two follow-up books that will follow the family as they adjust, bond, and grow. Source: Kalamazoo Gazette

Labels: encouragement, support, emotions

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Annual Conference Helps with Questions

The Adoption Community of New England held its 35th annual New England Adoption Conference on April 5 at Mill Pond School. About 1,000 people participated in 119 workshops aimed at helping answer some of the questions and concerns associated with adoption.
"The conference theme was 'Whole Life Adoption,' addressing adoption across the lifespan. Nancy J. Harper, executive director of Adoption Community of New England Inc., said 'We reach out and support all members of the adoption triad (adoptive families, birthparents and adopted children).' She said one conference goal was to support less-represented members of the triad, in particular birth families and adult adopted individuals."
One of the workshops, titled "Talking with Expectant Parents," focused on helping adoptive parents understand how best to communicate with birth parents before, during, and after the adoption process. Source: Worcester Telegram

Labels: support, questions, answers

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Adoptive Families Gather at Expo

On Saturday, April 5, the Monmouth/Ocean County Adoptive Families Support Group held its second annual adoption expo. The event drew a sizable crowd as adoptive families from around the county met and shared stories.
"Heather Malvica, 33, of Matawan said she adopted her 3-year-old daughter, Kate, from China. She also has a biological 18-month-old son, Michael, with her husband, Rich... 'We had decided to adopt, and my heart was drawn to China. So I started the process in October 2004...'"
She and her husband were matched with Kate in February 2006, when Kate was 15 months old. The Malvicas, and other families at the expo, are strong advocates for international adoption. Source: APP.com.

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Labels: families, awareness, support

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Doctor Gives Credit to Adoptive Parents

Yvette Martin is on the road to becoming an anesthesiologist and is currently finishing her medical studies at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota. She credits her adoptive parents with giving her the confidence she needed to pursue her dreams.
"Norman and Josephine adopted Yvette when she was just 6 months old. The couple decided to adopt after Josephine had some physical problems that kept her from being able to conceive. They adopted Yvette from out of state and from the moment they saw her they fell completely in love."
Now, as a young adult, Yvette still talks to her parents almost every day, and continues to receive the same love and support she has gotten all her life. Read more at CBS4Denver.com.

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Labels: support, adoptive_parents, confidence

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International Adoptive Families Share Experiences

Last Sunday, an adoption organization in Virginia - ValleyAdopt - sponsored a celebration honoring the Chinese New Year. The event was attended by families who have adopted, or are adopting, children from outside the United States.
"Part reunion and part support, the event is the largest of several that the group holds each year, chances for parents to get together, share stories and enjoy their children. For the kids, it's also an opportunity to interact with people who look like them - and who don't ask the awkward questions that the outside world sometimes does."
ValleyAdopt was started about seven years ago, as a support to adoptive families. The group now includes nearly 100 members who stay in touch throughout the year via the Internet. Read more at NewsLeader.com.

Labels: international, communication, support

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Son of My Soul

Best-selling author Debra Shiveley Welch has released a new book to coincide with November's being named National Adoption Month. Son of My Soul tells the story of the adoption of a special needs child and the joy he brings to the lives of those around him.
"President George W. Bush proclaimed on October 31, 2007 that November 2007 was designated National Adoption Month. The President also stated that by accepting the gift of these young children into their lives, parents are helping to contribute to the strength of our nation."
The senior reviewer at Midwest Books called Son of My Soul a "must read" for every adoptive parent.

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Labels: support, inspiration, love

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Dad Gets Nationally Recognized

Stuart Griffiths didn't start out with the intent of adopting. As a history major at Kansas University, he was simply trying to help by picking up a young man at a group foster home and taking him to practice. Now, years later, Griffiths has a degree in social work and has adopted five of 32 kids he's cared for through the Kansas foster care system.
"On October 3, all of the Griffiths family traveled to Washington D.C. where Stuart was presented with the CCAI Angel in Adoption Award. He was accompanied to the ceremony by Congresswoman Nancy Boyda, who said in a press release: 'For over a decade now, Stuart has opened his home and his heart to children in need. His efforts are moving and truly inspiring and I'm pleased to have the chance to honor his caring work.'"
Stuart's life is a busy one, but a good one. No longer a foster care parent, he now focuses all his energy on caring for the five boys have become permanent members of his family.

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Labels: support, foster_care, fathers

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Adopting and Adapting

The decision to adopt is not the end of a process, but the beginning of one - as many adoptive parents will agree. They will also agree that finalizing the adoption and taking a child into their home is not the end - but the beginning - of another process; one of adaptation.
"It sounds easy intellectually, but in the real world, it's human beings developing trust and confidence in each other,' Willie [Jones- an adoptive parent] said. Tapping counselors, social workers and doctors is crucial, they added. "You want to think all these kids need is love, but they need a whole lot more too,' Pam [Jones] cautioned."
Though the adjustment can be tough, most adoptive parents will agree that it's worth the struggle.

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Labels: support, adoption_process, adapting

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Small Danish Island Boasts High Adoption Rate

The Faroe Islands is a small Danish territory made up of 18 islands between Scotland and Iceland, and has a population of just over 48,000 people. Despite its small size, it has the highest adoption rate - in proportion to population - in the world.
"A dozen adoptions a year may not sound like much. In relative terms however, it amounts to four times more than in France or Denmark, according to official statistics from those countries... 'Everybody wants to have children here,' says [Heoein] Poulsen, who heads a support group for parents hoping to adopt."
Adopted children in the Faroe Islands come from Bolivia, Bulgaria, China, Ethiopia, India, South Africa, South Korea and Vietnam. Though incredibly multi-ethnic, many people say their adopted children have been accepted by others with open arms.

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Labels: support, statistics, rates

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Center Celebrates Adoption

November is National Adoption Month, and the Gladney Center for Adoption in Texas will be celebrating the many families that have been created through adoption. To date the center has places 27,000 children with loving families.
"It is appropriate for National Adoption Month to be positioned in the month of November celebrating a time of Thanksgiving. Using white ribbons to raise awareness, National Adoption Month celebrates families touched by adoption, honors birth mothers for their courageous choice, and remembers children who still need permanent homes."
The white ribbons are meant to remind people of the lifelong benefits that adoption offers and of the millions of lives that are directly, and positively, impacted by adoption.

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Labels: encouragement, support, celebration

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How to do it Fast - Part 1

Though not all adoptive parents are in a hurry to complete the adoption process, most would like to have it completed sooner rather than later. An experienced adoptive parent offers helpful suggestions for decreasing the amount of time it takes to bring an adopted child home.
"Get an understanding for which parts of the process you have control over and which parts you do not. For example, how long it takes to prepare the dossier is very much in the hands of the adoptive parents. Some take weeks. Some even take months. We accomplished ours in a matter of hours (less than a weekend). That is a part of the process we could control. Other things, such as court closures and other nuances of the legal systems in our country and others, are completely out of our hands. Figure out which parts you have some control over and get them done as fast as possible."
Other suggestions include reading directions thoroughly and following them completely, sending paperwork via FedEx or UPS so the package can be tracked, and keeping color copies of everything so that if an original gets lost it can be easily replaced.

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Labels: support, adoption_process, experience

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Sharing Advice and Experiences

There are a lot of books and articles that offer advice about trans-racial adoption. But the best advice comes from other adoptive parents.
"Parents know the good stuff. They know the tricks of the trade. They know how to get a homestudy and dossier done in record time and they know tricks to help survive the wait. They know what to do, how to react, what to say, where to go, how you feel, what is normal, how to prepare and how to handle the ins and outs of adoption."
With that in mind, Erin H, the moderator of a trans-racial adoption blog is asking adoptive parents to email her with advice for parents who are considering or in the process of adopting. She'll be compiling the information to post to her blog over the next several weeks. Read more at TransRacial.AdoptionBlogs.com.

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Labels: support, trans-racial, advice

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Hair Care

One thing that many couples don't think about with a trans-racial adoption is hair care. A Caucasian couple that's adopting an African-American child is going to have a steep learning curve when figuring out to care for their child's hair.
"Taking care of your child's hair will take some extra work and effort, but it is important that you do so. Doing so will not only show respect to your child's culture, but will also help your child build a healthy self esteem."
One adoptive parent recommends the Jamaican Mango and Lime line of products for African-American children. She has used them for her children and has been very pleased with the results. Read more at Transracial.Adoptionblogs.com.

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Labels: support, trans-racial, parenting

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Post-Adoption Support

Parents and families undoubtedly need support as they go through the adoption process. But the support shouldn't stop once an adoption is finalized and a new family has been formed. To this end, the North American Council on Adoptable Children has developed an extensive database of post-adoption organizations throughout the United States and Canada.
"Post-placement support is critical to achieving the goal of finding permanent, stable, loving families for children, as well as maintaining those families who have already adopted. Parents need information that will strengthen their families, and enable them to handle the challenges of adoptive parenting... Founded in 1974 by adoptive parents, the North American Council on Adoptable Children is committed to meeting the needs of waiting children and the families who adopt them."
The NACAC web site contains information about not only adoption support programs, but adoption subsidy resources, parent groups, and conferences. Read more at NACAC.org.

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Labels: support, resources, conferences

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Education Workers to Receive Adoption Stipend

New laws passed in Florida this week will increase the amount of money parents will receive for adoption. An amendment to one of the laws extends one-time payments to employees of schools, colleges and universities.
"'I see this as a very good thing,' said Naderah Salim, CEO of the Children's Network... 'Anything we can do that shows the families and the children that you are valued. This is a big step for families... The more resources we can put into the hands of a family, the better they can take care of the children.'"
Children's Family Network contracts with the Florida Department of Children and Families to care for foster children and facilitate adoptions in several counties. Though the new law has been signed by Florida Gov. Charlie Crist, the bill is pending approval of special funding.

Read more at News-Press.com.

Labels: support, financial_assistance, money

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Dave Thomas Foundation Raises Frosty Cash

Saturday and Sunday June 16th and 17th marked the first annual "Father's Day Frosty Weekend" meant to raise money to support foster care adoption. Though the final numbers aren't in yet, Wendy's Corporation estimates that it met its $1 million goal.
"The money will be used to support the Foundation and its signature program: Wendy's Wonderful Kids (WWK). This program is filling a critical gap by funding and supporting full-time adoption recruiters at local agencies in all 50 states and the District of Columbia to match prospective parents with waiting foster care children."
WWK first launched in 2004 with seven pilot cities. Today, there are 106 recruiters in 88 cities across North America.

Read more at BusinessWire.com.

Labels: support, foster_care

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The Questions You'll Get

At the start of the adoption process, adoptive families have lots of questions to ask; "Do we want an older child or an infant?" "Domestic or international adoption?" "Does the child's race matter?" After you've asked yourself those questions, other people will be asking you many more.
"You'll find that once you start telling people about your plans to adopt, that you are going to get a lot of questions. Family, friends, neighbors and nosy strangers will all 'want to know'."
Keep in mind that your adoption is personal and that you don't have to answer someone's question if it makes you uncomfortable. Be prepared, too, to answer questions from the social worker who conducts your home study. Your adoption agency can help you prepare for that.

Read more at AdoptionBlogs.com.

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Labels: support, parenting, privacy

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Children's Book Tells Story of Adoption

'Welcome Home, Forever Child' was written and illustrated by Christine Mitchell. It tells the story of a family who adopts an older child (older being a toddler or pre-schooler). The book is written in a poetic, iambic pentameter style, which makes it very appealing to younger children.

"Christine's inspiration for writing the book came after she and her husband adopted their younger daughter from foster care when she was four. 'I was disappointed by the scarcity of picture books depicting adoptive families like ours,' says Christine."

What makes the story even more fun is that the 'family' is actually a family of cats who wear funky, human clothes. Though it's lighthearted, the book conveys a positive message as the parents promise to love their new child forever. Read more at AdoptionBlogs.com.

Labels: support, older_children, adoptive_families

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Asian Bridge Helps with International Adoptions

Geoff and Heather Shaw adopted a daughter in 2004 from China. They get a lot of questions about their family, their daughter, and the adoption process. In an attempt to offer help and guidance to other prospective adoptive families, they found an organization called "The Asian Bridge".
"Although the Shaws' work focuses on Chinese adoptions, Geoff hopes that in time he will be able to expand the work of the organization and provide support to people hoping to adopt from other parts of the world."
When people contact the Asian Bridge, the Shaws offer to meet with them, and also introduce them to Lilah, their adopted Chinese daughter. They also help people get connected with the Sunny Ridge Family Center, the organization used by the Shaws when they adopted Lilah. Read more at SuburbanChicagoNews.com.

Labels: international, China, support

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Louisiana Opens Its Own "Heart Gallery"

The Center for Children and Families in Louisiana yesterday officially opened its "Heart Gallery", which showcases the portraits of 26 local children who are available for adoption through the Office of Community Services.
"The goal of the gallery is to 'elicit support for and interest in the lives of these children and ultimately find each child and sibling group a forever family,' [Erin] Stokes said. 'This gallery will be ongoing, moving from venue to venue, and as long as we have children here who have not been adopted, we will keep moving,' Stokes said."
Heart Galleries in other communities have been shown to increase adoption rates by as much as 40 percent. The Louisiana Center for Children and Families is hoping for similar results. Professional photographers donated their time to take both portrait and candid pictures of the children. Read more online.

Labels: awareness, support, adoption_rates

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"Can I Love an Adopted Child?"

Many people considering adoption ask themselves that question. It's a common fear among potential adoptive families. Though all potential adoptive parents want to believe that they'd be completely unbiased, and would love an adopted child as much as they would a biological child, there is still uncertainty.
"Talk to other adoptive families... Many adoptive parents are more than happy to talk about their experiences, their fears in the beginning and how things turned out for them. Hearing another adoptive parent admit to having similar concerns early on in their adoption process, and then seeing them united with their new child and completely in love with him or her, is very reassuring."
Another way to connect with other adoptive families is to join a local support group or online forum. Hearing positive stories from other families will help ease your fears as you move forward in the adoption process. Read more at Adoptionblogs.com.

Labels: support, trans-racial, adoptive_parents

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Dave Thomas Foundation - Helping Foster Children Find Loving Homes

Dave Thomas, founder of the Wendy's fast-food chain, had a dream of seeing every child in the United States foster care system placed in a loving home. To help that goal become a reality, he started the Dave Thomas Foundation and its signature program - Wendy's Wonderful Kids.
"Wendy's restaurants, their customers and other partners raise funds for the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption. The Foundation awards grants to local adoption organizations to hire recruiters to execute aggressive child-focused recruitment programs targeted exclusively on placing foster care children with adoptive families."
Wendy's Wonderful Kids started with just seven recruiters in seven states. Today, it boasts more than 87 recruiters in all 50 states, the District of Columbia and Canada who have helped place over 1,000 kids into permanent homes. Read more at DaveThomasFoundationForAdoption.com.

Labels: support, foster_care, services

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Open Adoption & Family Services Hosts Forum

This forum is a great place to post your adoptive family group's meeting dates and times, to find other families interested in joining or starting a group in your area, or to share tips for making adoptive family groups successful and fun. Visit the forum.

Labels: support, adoptive_families, forums

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Russian Support Group

Read one womens journey through the adoption process at http://russianbrown.blogspot.com.

Labels: international, support, adoptive_families

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Children's Books for Adoptive Families

Stacie Cahill's daughter Chelsea knew from a young age that she had been adopted. But when she started attending first grade, her classmates didn't understand adoption and most of them thought it was a negative thing.
"As a psychotherapist, Cahill was aware of the need for resources for families dealing with such issues, so she began to work on a book called 'Who Am I?' about an adopted child's concern about her identity."
Chelsea took the book to school and shared it with her classmates. Now they understand adoption better. Cahill also wrote a book called "I Know Who I Am", dedicated to her second adopted child  Brooklynn, and one called "My Parents Love Me Too" for biological children. Read more at CommunityPress.com.

Labels: support, identity, in_school

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Consider Creating a Lifebook

A Lifebook tells the story of your adopted child's life, including his or her history. It's a great way to honor your child, and help put the missing pieces together so your child understands where he or she came from.
"A Lifebook is a record of an adoptee's life that uses words, photos, your child's artwork, computer graphics, and memorabilia."
If you have information or pictures from an orphanage, or hospital (when your child was born) those are great items to include. Read more at ParentingIdeas.com.

Labels: support

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Trans-racial Adoptions More Popular

Though international adoptions get the most attention and "press", trans-racial adoptions - adopting an American child of a different race - are becoming increasingly popular as well. Trans-racial adoptions pose unique challenges, as mom and dad try to effectively blend cultures and deal with residual stereotyped about "blended families".
"It's important for the parents to be able to do everything from 'talk about racism to put cornrows in their children's hair,' [Adam] Pertman said."
Liz and Dan Grudus have adopted two African-American children. Liz says she is frequently asked questions about her family, and she takes the opportunity to dispel myths about trans-racial adoptions. Read more at App.com.

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Labels: international, support, trans-racial

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Books Help Dispel Myths and Mysteries of Adoption

In years past, most books about adoption focused on the actual process - what to expect, how much it might cost, etc. Today, more and more adoptive parents and adoptees are telling their stories of life after adoption, and they can help potential adoptive parents set realistic expectations for life with their new little ones.
"Three recent books examine different aspects of adoption from the adoptive parent's point of view. One is a review of the social culture and economic factors at play in adoption from China... The second... an adoption memoir... The third, a book of wise advice..."
All three books are reviewed by Jane Greer, who offers additional recommendations as well. Read more at UUWorld.org.

Labels: support, myths, misconceptions

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