Officials in Norfolk County (United Kingdom) are urging potential adoptive couples to consider older children. Few babies are available, and many older kids are waiting for a home. Now, couples who have adopted older kids are joining in the plea.

"They said: 'Adoption is not about meeting the needs of childless couples like us, however harsh that sounds. It is about giving children who have had sad starts to their lives a second chance for love, stability and happiness.'"

Many people prefer adopting babies because they don't think babies will have any emotional issues. But officials and adoptive parents agreed that babies are no less likely to have emotional baggage than older kids - it may just take longer for the problems to surface. Source: EDP24

Labels: older_children, adoptive_families, advice

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When Josh and Kaleb first came to the Eilers family, they were quite and suspicious. But now they realize that they're a permanent part of the family and they've begun to come out of their shells.

"Their parents are Rich and Tracy Eilers. The couple doesn't claim to be experts, but they've learned a lot about adopting teenagers. 'Things we take for granted. Standing around making brownies in the kitchen,' Tracy said. 'It really is the simple things. It's not the fancy things, it's not the money, it's not the going and spending. It's just the doing, and going together.'"

Rich and Tracy admit that there are unique challenges associated with adopting teenagers. There are "gaps" that need filling. But over time, they're being filled, and Josh and Kaleb are enjoying their forever family.

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Labels: families, teens, advice

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There are a lot of books and articles that offer advice about trans-racial adoption. But the best advice comes from other adoptive parents.

"Parents know the good stuff. They know the tricks of the trade. They know how to get a homestudy and dossier done in record time and they know tricks to help survive the wait. They know what to do, how to react, what to say, where to go, how you feel, what is normal, how to prepare and how to handle the ins and outs of adoption."

With that in mind, Erin H, the moderator of a trans-racial adoption blog is asking adoptive parents to email her with advice for parents who are considering or in the process of adopting. She'll be compiling the information to post to her blog over the next several weeks. Read more at TransRacial.AdoptionBlogs.com.

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Labels: support, trans-racial, advice

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Several decades ago, Terilee Wunderman adopted two children. She now has 30 years experience as both an adoptive parent and psychotherapist, and she’s always willing to share words of wisdom with new or soon-to-be parents.

The first tool in your arsenal should be a sense of humor and a little advance preparation, Wunderman said. "Use humor, and have a canned reply ready for insensitive comments. … Most people don’t know anything about adoption except for what they’ve seen on TV. A lot of times, it’s an adoptive parent’s job to educate others about it," she said. [Source: Deseret News]

Support groups are important for adoptive parents, too, so they can talk with others who understand the unique challenges they face. Ultimately, the relationships within the family, between parents, children and siblings, are the highest priority. Educating the informed is good, but should not be a parent’s main focus.

 

Labels: mothers, advice

Posted By: Stefanie Hamilton 1 Comment