Resources for Families with Adopted Children
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Researchers Explore Postpartum-Like Depression in Adoptive Parents

A new study out of Purdue University has found that some adoptive parents suffer from a condition similar to postpartum depression. They report decreased interest or pleasure in activities, difficulty sleeping, depressed feelings, and feelings of agitation.
"Many adoptive parents spend their time during the adoption process demonstrating they are not only going to be fit parents, but super parents, and then they struggle with trying to be the worlds best parent when the child is placed in the home& Parents may also experience feelings about their legitimacy as a parent, or even surprise if they dont really bond with the infant or child." [Source: Purdue University]
Researchers also found that many adoptive parents were reluctant to admit their struggles, because they felt guilty or ashamed. The studys authors are encouraging communities to make post-adoption support groups available to parents that will give them the help and reassurance they need.

Labels: depression, adoptive parents

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New Mexico Couple Honored for Efforts on Behalf of Adopted Daughter

From the moment Layla was born, doctors knew she wouldn't live long. Her brain was so underdeveloped that it was little more than a stem. She couldnt see, feed herself or eat, and she passed away when she was just 11 months old.

Days before her death, Layla was adopted by Joe and Melba Cotton, a New Mexico couple whose actions have earned them the Abigail Thomlinson award.

An article on the website of the Hobbs News-Sun provided the following details about the Cottons and the award they recently received:
The award is given to someone in the community each year that demonstrates the courage, willingness to mentor and strength Abigail exhibited during her short life.
Tom Thomlinson's voice broke as he described his daughter during Monday's ceremony. He said the Cottons embody the spirit of the award and that is why he chose them as this year's recipients.

"The award is given to people whose sole purpose is to help people," he said. "For all the children they have helped, this year's recipients stand for what I hope the awards stands for."

The Cottons have spent decades helping children. They have lost count of the number of children they have fostered in the past 25 years and as Joe said in his comments during the ceremony, the couple's journey began long ago when they lost their infant daughter.

Labels: adoptive parents, awards, special_needs

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Do International Adoptions Offer Greater Peace of Mind for Parents?

A Kentucky couples adoption of a Nepalese infant has prompted some discussion about the risks and benefits of domestic and international adoptions.

According to a Dec. 4 article on the website iSurfHopkins.com, the couple chose to adopt internationally because they were worried about the risks associated with domestic adoption:
According to Tara Whitmer, the couple has spent a considerable amount of time attempting to find local adoption possibilities, but discovered in many local private adoptions there were no guarantees. The Whitmers were concerned that there might be a chance that the estranged parents of orphaned children would come back and attempt to regain custody. The uncertainty of the possibilities frightened the couple.

iSurf news contacted Jenny Morin of the Department of Community Based Services (DCBS) in Hopkins County concerning the risks of adoption. Mrs. Morin stated that she understood the Whitmer's concerns regarding adoption, but for the birth-parents to simply change their minds was not sufficient reason for any Kentucky court to appeal and adoption.

"There are truly no guarantees," said Morin. "Three out of four private adoptions fall through because the birth parents change their minds at the last minute, prior to termination of parental rights. Once an adoption is finalized, however, it his highly unlikely that the decision will be overturned."

Labels: international, adoptive parents, kentucky

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Adoption Advocate Working to Find Parents for Ohio Children

Children in central Ohio have a strong advocate in Laura Barrington.

Barrington is the coordinator for Ross County Childrens Services, and according to an article in the Nov. 25 edition of the Chillicothe Gazette, she is working hard to match children in foster care with adoptive parents, ideally in time for the holidays:
One of the challenges for those working in fields dealing with adoption, she said, is finding placement for older children. Typically, infants and younger children are adopted more quickly than older ones.

"Some people have this idea of older children, that they are troubled youth, and that's not true," she said.

Another misconception is that a person has to be wealthy in order to adopt, she said.

Barrington said many of the older children go off to college and don't even have a home to return to on breaks or over the holidays. Those children, even though they are on the verge of full adulthood, need that family structure as well, she said.

"Every child is adoptable," Barrington said.

Labels: foster care, adoptive parents, ohio

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NRA Wants State to Stop Asking Adoptive Parents About Guns

The National Rifle Association has thrown its support behind a Florida bill that would ban adoption agencies in the state from asking potential adoptive parents if they own any firearms.

A Nov. 17 post by Amy Hatch of ParentDish.com provided the following details about the effort:
The bill was prompted by the case of a Brevard County, Fla., couple who, when applying to adopt a child, were asked if they had guns in their home, according to NBC Miami.

The Miami Herald reports that the couple, who was not named, contacted a lawyer who put them in touch with NRA lobbyist Marion Hammer. The lawyer told the couple that it would be easier to change the law than to sue.

The two were applying to adopt through the Children's Home Society of Florida, which asked the question because it is required by the state Department of Children and Families.

"An adoption agency has no right to subvert the privacy rights of gun owners," Hammer told the Herald.

Labels: adoptive parents, adoption_agencies, guns, weapons

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Adoption Support Group Meeting in Iowa Thursday (Nov. 19)

On Thursday, November 19th, adoptive families are invited to attend a support group at Our Savior Lutheran Church in Newton, Iowa.
The support group meeting will be led by Iowa KidsNets Ames Area Adoption Network. KidsNet is the statewide collaboration of agencies that recruits, trains, licenses and provides support for Iowas foster and adoptive families. (Source: Newton Daily News)
The meeting will begin at 6:30 p.m. Childcare and snacks will be provided. For more information visit the KidsNet website at www.iowakidsnet.com.

Labels: adoptive parents, support, iowa

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Campain Encourages Adoption of Foster Kids

Day-to-day life isnt very glamorous for Angela and Roger Wilmoth, as most of their time is devoted to raising the five children they adopted from foster care in Tennessee.

According to an Oct. 30 article by Janiell Ross of The Tennessean, the Shelbyville couple's dedication to their family has earned them a spot in a new campaign designed to encourage the adoption of foster children:
For all the attention that celebrities like Angelina Jolie and Madonna have brought to foreign adoption, child advocates and some government agencies are making an effort to gently remind prospective parents that there remain many orphaned children closer to home.

This week, the Ad Council and AdoptUSKids released a new series of ads depicting average Americans who have become parents of children adopted from foster care. ...

"I don't think there's any way we could have afforded all of the fees if we had tried a private adoption, and I can't imagine looking anywhere else, adopting a child from somewhere around the world when there are thousands of kids right here that need help."

Labels: adoptive parents, foster_care

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Minor League Baseball Team Hosts Adoption Night

When the Harrisburg Senators hit the field for their Sept. 3 season finale, team members were joined by a special group of young people: foster children in search of permanent adoptive placements.

A Sept. 3 article by Fox43 producer Jason Cowdell provided the following details about the Senators' efforts to call attention to the need for adoptive parents:
About 20 kids teamed up with the baseball players, who would play for them, and one child threw out the ceremonial first pitch of the game. The event is designed to bring awareness of child adoption in the state. Michelle Lobaugh, of Aspers, Adams County, adopted a child. She says its nice to have events like these to help children.
The event was hosted by Diakon Adoption and Foster Care.

Labels: adoptive parents, foster_care

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Texas Gathering Reunites Adoptees, Birth and Adoptive Families

Most family reunions look and sound very similar  relatives who haven't seen each other in a year exchange hugs and marvel at how big the kids have gotten. But Camp Abrazo is a different kind of reunion that includes children, adoptive and biological parents.
This years reunion is taking place at the Mayan Dude Ranch in Bandera [TX], and participants are coming from all over Texas as well as New Jersey, Tennessee, Georgia, Illinois, Virginia, Minnesota, Arkansas, Indiana and Mississippi. (Source: PR Inside)
Many families make the reunion an annual event, because it helps their children feel secure in the love felt by both the birth and adoptive parents.

Labels: adoptive parents, adopted children, birth_parents, texas

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For Single Adoptive Dad, Every Day is Father's Day

Father's Day may be over for this year, but don't try telling that to Brian Miller. For Miller, a single dad to adopted son Johnathan, every day is Fathers Day -- a day to celebrate his son, and the special relationship they have.

Today, Brian describes Johnathan as both is son and his best friend, but according to a June 19 segment on National Public Radio's "Morning Edition," becoming a family wasn't the easiest experience for either one of the Millers:
Johnathan was 7 when Miller adopted him, and he wasn't quite sure what to make of the experience.

Johnathan suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder and didn't understand that the adoption was final. He feared that Miller might give him back.

Once when the school called to tell Miller that Johnathan wasn't paying attention, Johnathan ripped the phones out of the wall. He was scared that Miller might change his mind if he did something wrong.

On the flip side, when Miller tried to take privileges  like TV  away from his son, Johnathan would say, "Wait till I tell the judge this one." Then Miller would have to remind him, "It's over Johnathan, you're adopted. There [are] no more judges in your life."
Once Johnathan realized that his home life was, his behavior and academic performance began to improve. For example, when he was first adopted, he was a special education student, but now he attends regular classes.

Labels: adoptive parents, special_needs, fathers

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Bill to Authorize Paid Adoption Leave Awaits Senate Vote

The U.S. House of Representatives recently passed a bill that would provide paid parental leave for up to four weeks for either the birth or adoption of a child.

A similar bill was also passed by the House last year, but died in the Senate. However, a June 9 article on the Government Executive website indicates that the Senate may be more likely to pass a parental leave bill this year:
Proponents of the current bill said the political climate in 2009 is more favorable to passage because of Democratic control of Congress, and a president who co-sponsored similar legislation as a senator. "It's going to really help our chances in the Senate," said Randy Erwin, legislative director for the National Federation of Federal Employees.
Though the bill is not yet on the Senate calendar, Government Executive writer Alex M. Parker reported that a companion bill has been put before the Senate Homeland Security and Governmental Affairs federal workforce subcommittee.

Labels: adoptive parents, legislation

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Photo Exhibition Aims to Connect Foster Kids with Adoptive Parents

According to the June 5 edition of the South Florida Sun Sentinel, a Hollywood, Fla., restaurant will be hosting a museum-quality photo exhibition that is designed to help connect foster children with adoptive parents:
Photos of about 100 foster children in search of permanent homes will be on display [June 13] at Dave & Busters as part of a state effort to encourage adoptions.

The Children's Trust Miami Heart Gallery and Broward Heart Gallery, a museum quality traveling exhibit, will feature the kids' photos from 4 to 6 p.m. at the restaurant, 3000 Oakwood Blvd., Hollywood.

"These are the kids who are looking for families to adopt them," said Flora Beal of the state Department of Children & Families, the free event's sponsor. The exhibit also will provide profiles of the foster kids and take-home cards to be filled out by prospective parents.
The Sun Sentinel reported that parents who adopt children that are featured in this exhibit will receive assistance with adoption costs, free training, and financial help for the adopted children's college education.

Labels: adoptive parents, foster_care

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Wendy's Founder's Foundation Helps Potential Adoptive Parents

Approximately four out of ten adults is considering adoption. Knowing where to start can be difficult and overwhelming. Web sites such as the one established by the Dave Thomas Foundation (www.davethomasfoundation.org) can help would-be adoptive parents familiarize themselves with issues that are important to the adoption process
As the famous father of Wendy's fast food chain, the late Dave Thomas, himself adopted, dedicated much of his life and resources to furthering the adoption of children in foster care in the United States. Visitors to the Web site can send for the fact-filled guide, "A Child is Waiting: A Step by Step Guide to Adoption," in addition to a toolkit that can guide you in introducing adoption benefits to your employer. -- Source: The Daily News Journal (TN)
Using the Internet to educate yourself about options, challenges, and other adoption issues can help you make the best, most informed decision about whether or not adoption is right for you. From finding the right adoption agency to preparing for a home study, the adoption process can be complex and confusing -- but making the effort to learn all you can will make the effort much smoother and far less frustrating.

Labels: adoptive parents, education

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Celebrations Honor Birth Moms of Adopted Kids

For women whose children have been adopted by others, Mother's Day can be a particularly poignant experience. But since 1993, the birth mothers of adopted children have had the opportunity to address their feelings and be honored for their sacrifices during an event known as "Birthmother's Day."

A May 10 article by Cleveland Plain Dealer writer Laura Johnston described the motivations behind these celebrations:
About 125,000 children are adopted each year in the United States, about 40 percent through public-welfare agencies, research shows. In the vast majority of adoptions today, the birth mother has some contact with the adoptive parents. For most of the 20th century, though, adoptions were anonymous. ...

"They brought a child into this world who they're not parenting," said Betsie Norris, executive director of Adoption Network Cleveland. "It's not something they've forgotten about. But that type of motherhood isn't acknowledged on Mother's Day. For birth mothers, it's very bittersweet."
"Although the rest of the world doesn't know, you know what the anniversary means to you and how important it is," one mother, a 31-year-old graduating from medical school, told the Plain Dealer. "To have everybody there to respect you as a mother, whether or not you're raising a child, it's incredibly powerful."

As is the case with many birth mothers, many adopted teens are also struggling with unresolved conflicts related to separation. Some therapists specialize in helping adopted teens with separation-related conflicts, as does Mount Bachelor Academy, a private therapeutic boarding school in central Oregon.

Labels: adoptive parents, adopted children, birth-mothers, separation

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NY Audit Finds Fraudulent Payments to Ineligible Adoptive Parents

A state audit of New York’s Office of Children and Family Services found that over $200,000 in improper payments were made to parents who had adopted hard-to-place children. The payments were received by adoptive parents whose kids had either passed away or were too old to qualify for aid.

The Office of Children and Family Services doled out $180,783 in aid for 25 children who were listed as deceased, according to an audit conducted between January 2007 and January 2009. ...

The agency stopped the improper payments during the course of the audit and officials are now trying to recover the money.” [Source: Democrat and Chronicle]

Though $200,000 may not seem like much for a program that pays out over $490 million each year, it is money that could have been spent to help adopt more kids out of the foster care system. The Offices of Children and Family Services, in an attempt to prevent future mistakes, plans to begin partnering with the state Department of Health to match vital statics of children who are receiving aid.
 

Labels: adoptive parents, fraud

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Adoptive Mom Writes Book About Talking to Children About Adoption

Lauren Marshal never intended to write a book. Her foray into the publishing world was the result of her creative attempt to talk with her youngest daughter about being adopted.

“What started out as a gift for her daughter became a delightful book that her older daughter, Hannah, illustrated and Lauren had published so that other families can use the story as a way to encourage that ongoing dialog.” - Source: Seattle Post Intelligencer

Abby was adopted from China by Lauren and her husband when she was just a year old. Though Lauren and her husband had been open with Abby about her adoption from the beginning, something clicked when Abby was 2 ½, and she suddenly understand what “adoption” meant. That conversation became the catalyst for Lauren’s book, “My Beautiful Bow,” which is now available through Amazon.

Labels: adoptive parents, communication, adopted children, tips

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