For parents, talking to a child about adoption may be likened to talking with a child about sex: It’s awkward for both parent and child, and both want it over as soon as possible. But children who have been adopted need to feel free to ask questions and express concerns.

“Children often believe that they are being disloyal to the adoptive family when they have feelings and questions about the birth family. As a result, they may avoid conversation about the adoption and the birth family even when they have burdensome questions or troubling feelings. Adoptive parents must look for opportunities to raise the issue [of] adoption, and ask the child for questions.” [Source: Associated Content]

Invite your child to ask questions about his birth family. Find ways to bring it up during casual conversation. If, for example, your adopted child is a gifted musician and music doesn’t run in your family, ask whether he thinks he might have gotten that trait from his birth family. On special occasions, like Mother’s and Father’s Day, ask your child if she’d like to do something special for – or to honor- her birth parents.


 

Labels: communication, parenting advice

Posted By: Stefanie Hamilton