In a May 24 post on examiner.com, adoptive parent and blogger Marcie Pickelsimer takes the creative forces behind the upcoming horror/slasher film "Orphan" to task for their negative portrayals of adopted children:

The trailer is so heartbreaking. Just the message in the trailer gives misinformation about adoption, reinforcing the very myth that adoptive communities try to hard to eradicate; that all older adoptees are troubled.

How many hundreds of thousands of adopted children will see this trailer on national television and hear an adoptee say "it must be hard to love an adopted child as much as you own"? How many attachment disordered children will be sent back to therapy because they get ideas from the young girl's actions? How many families could be sent into turmoil because of one movie?

According to the horror film websiteBloody Disgusting, "Orphan" tells the story of a couple who decide to adopt a child from an orphanage following "the tragic loss of their unborn child." The adopted child, Esther, is not the angelic child she appears to be, resulting in a series of horrific events.

"This feeds the notion that older adoptees are very troubled and you should beware. Thats not an image any of us want the general public to have of our kids," Pickelsimer wrote. "It plays into peoples deepest fears."

Labels: adopted children, media

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Children all over the country are in need of loving, stable foster care homes. Young people whose own families are in crisis need nurturing adults to care for them. The ability of foster care to meet this need was the subject of a letter to the editor that appeared in the May 26 edition of the Marshfield (Wisconsin) News Herald:

Most communities are urgently seeking more everyday people to help these youth overcome their troubled childhoods and realize their full potential.

No matter what their age, every young person in foster care benefits from a meaningful connection to a caring adult who becomes a supportive and lasting presence in his or her life.

Written by Liz Stern and Grace Bauer, who serve as foster care coordinators with the Wood County Department of Social Services, the letter also noted that May is Foster Care Month in the state of Wisconsin, and state officials are hoping this designation will encourage adults to explore the possibility of becoming a foster parent.

Labels: foster_families, foster_care

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Approximately four out of ten adults is considering adoption. Knowing where to start can be difficult and overwhelming. Web sites such as the one established by the Dave Thomas Foundation (www.davethomasfoundation.org) can help would-be adoptive parents familiarize themselves with issues that are important to the adoption process

As the famous father of Wendy's fast food chain, the late Dave Thomas, himself adopted, dedicated much of his life and resources to furthering the adoption of children in foster care in the United States. Visitors to the Web site can send for the fact-filled guide, "A Child is Waiting: A Step by Step Guide to Adoption," in addition to a toolkit that can guide you in introducing adoption benefits to your employer. -- Source: The Daily News Journal (TN)

Using the Internet to educate yourself about options, challenges, and other adoption issues can help you make the best, most informed decision about whether or not adoption is right for you. From finding the right adoption agency to preparing for a home study, the adoption process can be complex and confusing -- but making the effort to learn all you can will make the effort much smoother and far less frustrating.

Labels: adoptive parents, education

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As have many other children who were involved in international adoptions, two adopted children in Montrose, Colo., have established new lives in a new family far from the poverty-stricken village where they were born. But thanks to the efforts of their adoptive parents and many other community members, the children (now ages 8 and three) retain a connection with the nation in which they were born.

A May 17 article on The Denver Channel website described the efforts that Michael and Kimberly McGehee have made to ensure that their adopted children remain connected with the culture into which they were born:

Though their biological parents died from AIDS, the two children tested negative for the virus. Jenna and Stephen have adjusted well to life in Colorado, but Michael and Kimberley were determined to ensure the kids didn't forget their roots.

"We've always wanted to keep the kids connected to their culture, so we knew we had to do something," Michael said. The village in Uganda, where Jenna and Stephen were raised, is in the heart of a ghetto, covered in trash. Much of the population has been stricken by the AIDS virus and can hardly afford to eat meals regularly or clothe themselves. Despite the cost, the McGehees decided to raise money to help their children's homeland and make the trip to Uganda as a family.

When the family traveled to Uganda in January, the money that was contributed during a number of community- and school-based fundraisers paid for a feast for the villagers, 500 pairs of shoes, and the construction of a new playground.

Even families whose adoption stories are less dramatic than that of the McGehees are likely to experience issues related to their circumstances through which their adopted children joined the family. For teens who are continuing to struggle with these types of issues, Mount Bachelor Academy (a private boarding school in Prineville, Oregon) provides an innovative and effective therapeutic program for adopted students.

Labels: international, adopted children

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Author and adoptee Ashley Rhodes-Courter lived in 14 different foster homes in just nine years. She experienced abuse and separation from her parents. She will be sharing her experience Thursday, June 11, in San Angelo, Texas.

As her mother spiraled out of control, Ashley was left clinging to an unpredictable, dissolving relationship. ... In spite of being taken away from home, being juggled between caseworkers ... Ashley found the courage to succeed- and in doing so, discovered the power of her own voice. (Source: KKSA Radio)

Ashley will share her story, "Three Little Words: Breaking Free from the Past," at the San Angelo Convention Center from 7 to 9 p.m. Admission is free.

Even in the best of cases, adoption can be a traumatic experience for both the adopted child and the adoptive family. To help adopted children address challenges related to their adoption, Mt. Bachelor Academy (a private boarding school in Prineville, Oregon) features an innovative and highly effective adoption curriculum.

Labels: foster_care, adoption_experts

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With families across the nation experiencing recession-related financial pressures, adoption agencies have noticed an increase in the number of women who are choosing to place their babies for adoption. According to a May 19 article by USA Today writer Wendy Koch, the increase in women who are opting for adoption includes those who already have children:

Many of these women are in their 20s and already have at least one child, says Joan Jaeger of The Cradle, [an adoption agency in the Chicago area] ... She says 30 percent more women are inquiring about placing a child for adoption than a year ago.

"The economy has made them take a second look at adoption," says Scott Mars of American Adoptions, a private agency in Overland Park, Kan. In the past year, he's seen a 10 percent to 12 percent increase in women inquiring about placing a child for adoption and a 7 percent to 10 percent increase in actual placements, as strong demand for healthy infants continues to outstrip the supply. ...

"Our phones are ringing off the hook," says Vicki Saporta of the National Abortion Federation, which represents abortion providers. She says calls to her group's hotline have nearly tripled in the past year, many from women whose families have lost jobs.

The majority of women who place their children for adoption in the United States stay in touch with the child's new family, Koch reported. "In up to 90% of domestic infant adoptions," she wrote, "... adoptive parents maintain some contact with birth parents."

Labels: economy, birth-mothers, birth_parents, pressures

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In a case that demonstrates the degree to which legal confusion can derail an international adoption, a North Carolina couple who traveled to Egypt to adopt twin boys have instead been arrested and put on trial for alleged child trafficking.

According to a May 13 Associated Press article, Iris Botros and Louis Andros attempted to adopt in the United States, but a number of factors including Andros' age (he is 70, she is 40) prevented them from doing so. AP writers Anna Johnson and Maggie Michael provided the following details of the events surrounding the couple's arrest:

In Muslim countries like Egypt, such adoptions are nearly impossible, snarled in religious tradition and murky laws. Botros and Andros ... also may have been caught up in an attempt by the Egyptian government to show it is cracking down on human trafficking after criticism from the United States.

On the advice of Egyptian friends, the two traveled to Cairo in the fall and were put in touch with a Coptic Christian orphanage that was caring for two newborn orphans. The orphanage gave them forged documents to say Botros had given birth to the children, and the couple donated $4,600 to the orphanage ...

But when they tried to get American passports for the babies, a U.S. Embassy employee became suspicious of them ... When asked by an embassy official, Botros admitted she wasn't the biological mother, [the couple's] lawyer said.

"Adoption experts said the case highlights the importance of being well-informed and working with governments and reputable agencies to make sure laws and social norms are followed," the AP writers reported.

Labels: international, laws, adoption rights

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For women whose children have been adopted by others, Mother's Day can be a particularly poignant experience. But since 1993, the birth mothers of adopted children have had the opportunity to address their feelings and be honored for their sacrifices during an event known as "Birthmother's Day."

A May 10 article by Cleveland Plain Dealer writer Laura Johnston described the motivations behind these celebrations:

About 125,000 children are adopted each year in the United States, about 40 percent through public-welfare agencies, research shows. In the vast majority of adoptions today, the birth mother has some contact with the adoptive parents. For most of the 20th century, though, adoptions were anonymous. ...

"They brought a child into this world who they're not parenting," said Betsie Norris, executive director of Adoption Network Cleveland. "It's not something they've forgotten about. But that type of motherhood isn't acknowledged on Mother's Day. For birth mothers, it's very bittersweet."

"Although the rest of the world doesn't know, you know what the anniversary means to you and how important it is," one mother, a 31-year-old graduating from medical school, told the Plain Dealer. "To have everybody there to respect you as a mother, whether or not you're raising a child, it's incredibly powerful."

As is the case with many birth mothers, many adopted teens are also struggling with unresolved conflicts related to separation. Some therapists specialize in helping adopted teens with separation-related conflicts, as does Mount Bachelor Academy, a private therapeutic boarding school in central Oregon.

Labels: adoptive parents, adopted children, birth-mothers, separation

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A probate judge in Michigan's Van Buren County is requiring potential adoptive parents to sign a controversial document that requires stay-at-home parenting until the child is eligible for preschool. A May 10 article by Kalamazoo Gazette writer Rosemary Parker provided details about Judge Frank Willis's "morality pledge":

Willis requires parents who adopt infants in his county to agree that one of them will be home with the baby during the first year and won't work full time during the baby's preschool years. Willis is perhaps the only justice in Michigan to require such a pledge, which he acknowledges is not legally binding and may be offensive and outdated to some. ...

Willis said he does not require the pledge from adoptive parents of foster children, children with special needs or children from other countries. He restricts the requirement to parents adopting babies born in this country because "this is a babies' market; that's where the waiting list is." ...

Michigan Supreme Court and Court Administrative Office spokeswoman Marcia McBrien declined to answer questions about the legality of Willis's pledge requirement, in the event the matter might someday come before the state's top court.

Monica Farris Linkner, a member of the American Academy of Adoption Attorneys, told the Gazette that Willis' requirement limits the adoption of healthy newborn babies to two-parent families whose socioeconomic status allows them to get by on only one income.

Labels: adoption rights

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A man who claims to be the father of a four-year-old girl that pop star Madonna hopes to adopt says he wants to raise the girl himself. James Kambewa said that he has never met his supposed daughter and that he thought she had died along with her mother, who was Kambewas then-girlfriend.

In an Early Show world exclusive, Kambewa tells correspondent Priya David, "I do not want my baby to be adopted because I want to take care of her and I'm capable to take care of my baby ... Mercy, she is a Malawian  so [I] need her to grow as a Malawian, as well with our culture." (Source: CBS)

Madonna's adoption bid was initially rejected by a Malawian court because she hadn't met the country-s residency requirement of 12 to 18 months before adopting. Court officials, and some human rights groups, have expressed concern over the possible bending of the rules of international adoption, saying it puts children at greater risk of being trafficked.

Labels: international, adoption rights

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SAS, a leader in business analytics, has been named one of the Best Adoption-Friendly Workplaces in America by the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption. SAS has offered adoption assistance for 20 years, paid adoption leave for 12 years, and provided on-site childcare 28 years.

"SAS is committed to supporting families through a comprehensive benefit package, numerous employee programs and a flexible work environment ..." said Jennifer Mann, Vice President of Human Resources as SAS. "Our commitment creates loyal employees who foster long-term customer relationships." (Source: Web Wire)

The Dave Thomas Foundation was founded in 1992 to raise awareness of, and support for, adoption. Its annual list of adoption-friendly workplaces is determined by an analysis of company adoption benefits, including both financial reimbursement and paid leave.

In addition to helping parents during the adoption process, providing post-adoption support can make a significant contribution to ability of adoptive families to bond, identify potential problems, and overcome challenges in a unified manner.

Labels: adoption_friendly

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