A recent article at TIME.com reports on the challenges parents and families of older adoptees face. Because of the growing trend of adopting teenagers out of foster care, there is a rise in the number of teens who fail to transition into a permanent family. In addition to normal teenage rebellion and adolescent growing pains, foster teens also have to deal with the changes that accompany adoption. While adoptive parents go through parenting classes, they say they are never fully ready for some of the challenges they experience with their adopted adolescents. Typically, adopted teenagers have to deal with feelings of abandonment, not belonging, previous abusive relationships, depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder. Experts say the keys to creating a good bond between adopted teens and their parents is to keep the lines communication open and be supportive. Read more about adopted adolescents at TIME.com.

While many couples look for babies and toddlers to adopt, more and more are choosing teenagers in foster care for adoption. Older couples who feel that they don't have the energy to chase after younger children are now looking for adolescents to bring into their family. By providing stability and security, couples that adopt teenagers are lowering the number of children that turn 18 and are kicked out of the foster care system unprepared for the real world. Read more about the challenges in placing older kids with adoptive parents from VOAnews.com.

When parenting teens or any child with emotional, behavioral, or mental health issues, parents tend to look at what needs to be fixed. "My child is unable to self regulate so maybe she needs therapy..." Or, "My teen has anger management issues and needs to work through that." Or, "Now that my son has been diagnosed as bipolar, where will we find a child psychiatrist?"

Sometimes parents, teachers, and even service providers forget that the ultimate goal is to develop socially well adjusted and emotionally stable kids. Occasionally, it's beneficial to step back from the process of improving behaviors and fixing the problems, to contemplating the hoped-for results.

What's on your list of what a well-adjusted child or teen should be like? Are they attached to parents and family? Do they have solid friendships? Do they stay in school? Will they find a job they love?

A new perspective will not change the difficulties, but it does provide an opportunity to refocus on the hopeful positive outcomes, rather than the drudgery of addressing challenging issues.

For many years, adoption meant bringing a newborn into your home, to love and cherish as if you'd given birth to them. Nowadays, adoption means bringing a four, nine, or twelve year old into your family and celebrating the many ways that families can be created.

Older child adoption provides parents with an opportunity to learn about their child's interests, health, and abilities before they adopt. What medical conditions do they have? How do they interact with their peers? Are they attached to a particular caregiver or foster parent?

Along with the benefits of adopting older kids there can be challenges. Due to difficulties in their early years, older kids may suffer from issues of trauma and stress, have difficulty with attachment and bonding, or may have undiagnosed physical or mental health issues.

The most successful older child adoptions tend to include the following: parents who are educated before adoption about potential challenges, honest disclosure of a child’s health and history, the ability of parents to resolve differences between their expectations and the reality of their child, parents who are able to combine structure with affection, and, support by extended family and friends.

For those considering older child adoption, become educated about both the positives and the negatives of older child adoption. For those parenting older adopted kids, search out the support and resources needed to raise a child to be a successful, well-adjusted addition to society.

Older child adoption can be an exciting, fulfilling way to grow a family. Without knowledge and education, however, parents adopting older kids may struggle until they find the resources that they and their child are in need of. When those resources and supports are in place, parents and children in older child adoptive families can grow together in love and joy.

Parent, teacher, and child can all be impacted by adoption related issues. Parents wonder how much to tell schools. Teachers need to create assignments sensitive to adoptive and foster care families. And, children wonder if having been adopted will make them different.

In the early years of school, it's often beneficial for schools to know about any possible adoption related issues that your child might have so that they can mitigate the impact. If a child has been internationally adopted, there may be language-related issues to be dealt with. If a foster child has been adopted, there may be questions from other students about the change of last name. For a child suffering from the aftermath of trauma and neglect in their early years, they may need special accommodations to help overcome these issues.

Teachers can be blind sided by adoption related issues if they give out assignments that may be inappropriate for a child who was adopted. Or, if a child needs to miss school due to special therapies that are needed to help the child, they need to be aware of the situation.

Children have varying issues about being adopted depending on their personality, age at adoption, stages of their life, and more. They may be uneasy talking about having been adopted, or they might share about it at every opportunity.

Families need to determine what needs to be shared with schools throughout their child’s school years. Teachers need to develop adoption-sensitive materials. And children need to be empowered to talk about being adopted or not.