When parenting teens or any child with emotional, behavioral, or mental health issues, parents tend to look at what needs to be fixed. "My child is unable to self regulate so maybe she needs therapy..." Or, "My teen has anger management issues and needs to work through that." Or, "Now that my son has been diagnosed as bipolar, where will we find a child psychiatrist?"

Sometimes parents, teachers, and even service providers forget that the ultimate goal is to develop socially well adjusted and emotionally stable kids. Occasionally, it's beneficial to step back from the process of improving behaviors and fixing the problems, to contemplating the hoped-for results.

What's on your list of what a well-adjusted child or teen should be like? Are they attached to parents and family? Do they have solid friendships? Do they stay in school? Will they find a job they love?

A new perspective will not change the difficulties, but it does provide an opportunity to refocus on the hopeful positive outcomes, rather than the drudgery of addressing challenging issues.